Sunday, January 20, 2008 at 10:22AM
DC ASTD Webmaster
By Joan Matochik, JM
Communications, www.jmcomtraining.com
Whether you are communicating
face to face or on the telephone, it can be a lost business opportunity or a
successful one, even in difficult situations with angry or irritated customers,
clients, vendors and co-workers. Making the best possible impression is
critical to establishing good interpersonal relations and to developing a
profitable business.
Creating this favorable
impression not only translates into satisfied individuals and increased
business profitability but also less workplace stress and frustration—for you
and others. As author Eric Maisel writes in his
book, 20 Communication Tips at Work, “Never treat work communications
cavalierly…When you are at work, all communications are meaningful and
important.” We should not take our routine communications with others for
granted. Every single communication situation can be a win-win
opportunity if we know and apply effective communication skills.
Three
Stages of Anger
It is no small task to handle
irritated and angry individuals. But with some helpful strategies to
remember and utilize and a determination to remain professional, calm and
self-confident, employees can surmount this workplace obstacle.
There are there stages of anger
often seen in individuals, characterized by the acronym MAD:
Most individuals are at the
“miffed” stage. Remembering the Golden Rule, “Treat others as you would
like to be treated,” should never be forgotten in all communication situations,
particularly difficult ones.
Eight
Steps to Diffuse Anger
When you exhibit professionalism,
it is helpful in alleviating anger in others. Throughout all situations,
remember to stay calm and do not display heated emotion. Keep the tone of
your voice caring, helpful and empathetic—not cold, indifferent or
hostile. Speak slowly, while lowering your voice pitch
slightly. This technique will encourage the angry individual to
calm down more quickly.
These eight steps will also help
you successfully in handling difficult individuals:
1. Don’t buy into the anger.
Take the anger professionally, but not personally. Remember to separate
the problem from the person, and focus on the problem.
2. Listen to understand.
Hear the individual out without interrupting, as this makes people even angrier.
3. Show empathy. Impress
an individual that you genuinely care about his problem or issue.
Acknowledge his feelings and restate the facts. Often, it helps to ask yourself, “How is this person feeling?” Annoyed,
disappointed or frustrated? Try to use the appropriate descriptive word
when you restate the problem. For example, “I can imagine how frustrated
you are that your product shipment hasn’t arrived on time. I will see
what I can do to expedite the shipment.”
4. Identify the other’s needs
and wants. Ask appropriate questions, both open-ended ones to gather
additional information, and closed-end ones to confirm information with a
one-word or “yes/no” answer. Verify your understanding of the person’s
problem by restating the facts.
5. Offer options.
Aim to be positive, not negative. Tell individuals what you can do for
them, without emphasizing what you can’t do. It is helpful often to use
the “condition/benefit” formula, for instance: “If you provide me with
your invoice number, then I can check on your order.”
6. Find a positive solution.
Try to come up with suggestions to rectify the problem and ask the individual
for his input. Having the individual become involved in the problem solution
will make him feel better about you and your business.
7. Thank the person.
Express appreciation to the individual for bringing the problem or issue to
your attention.
8. Follow up on any
commitments. This is vital for maintaining and building better
interpersonal relations. Be sure to check back promptly with the
individual to confirm that the necessary action has actually been
completed. Your professionalism will assuredly stand out if you do this
last step.
Raising our voice, using
threatening or abusive language and displaying derogatory gestures and other
body language never help to make any communication situation better. Simply,
they accelerate another’s anger and, therefore, should be avoided. By
applying this eight-step approach, employees can turn a difficult situation into
a highly successful communication encounter. Calm, confident and
professional: Every communication situation can be a win-win opportunity when
we demonstrate these qualities.
Joan Matochik,
president/owner of JM Communications, www.jmcomtraining.com, has been a
professional business training instructor, coach and consultant for over 17
years. Currently based in northern